SOME ALL CAPS BEAUTY TIPS FOR PEACEBANG AKA *THE* REVEREND DOCTOR VICTORIA WEINSTEIN AKA VICKI THE IMPALER. . .

Inspired by the one and (thankfully. . .) only Reverend Doctor Victoria Weinstein's most recent Peacebang's Beauty Tips For Ministers blog post entitled 'Formality!' The Emerson Avenger has come up with a few brand spanking new ALL CAPS beauty tips for Vicki The Impaler herself. . .

WE WEAR STOCKINGS OR SOCKS WHEN WE ANALLY IMPALE REPUBLICAN STATE SENATORS ON THE STATUE OF LIBERTY'S TORCH.




WE DO NOT SLIP ON CASUAL FLATS OR SPORTY SHOES WITH CLERICAL VESTMENTS AND GIVE "LESS THAN PERFECT" UU YOUTH THE SIDE OF OUR BOOT IN THE TUSHIE HARD WITH OUR BARE ANKLES SHOWING.




Here are some more beauty tips for Peacebang that The Emerson Avenger has plagUUrized from the same blog post. . .

Anally impaling a U.S. state senator on the Statue Of Liberty's torch is a public event. Any time UU clergy are asked to participate in a Sadistic ritual known as anal impalement, they are attending a public event and representing not just their brutish, Sadistic selves, but the Clergy as a whole. Whether or not they are saying a word during the anal impalement, they are fulfilling a symbolic function (as well as a collegial and ecclesiastical one) and casual footwear inserted in their mouth does not cut it.

Lather, rinse and repeat for ALL anal impalements.




Booting deliquent Unitarian Universalist youth in the tushie HARD calls not only for appropriate footwear and socks or stockings but for intentional kicking of the UU youth's butt and subsequent loss of face.

Those UU clergy who will be appearing in historical photographs should make some effort beyond just showing up and throwing on a gigantic pearl necklace and faux leopard skin sweater.




Is there some theological issue with Republicans that I don’t know about? Is a little lipstick or concealer so much to ask? Would it kill UUs to anally impale a Republican state senator on the Statue of Liberty's torch once in awhile? Sorry, Peacebang gets carried away. . .

I just don’t want ANY UU clergy to be caught on film looking well-nigh bedraggled.





Comments

Katie Hayes said…
Robin, if I might ask you a question...

You do not advocate verbal abuse of a fat person (male/female) just on account of that person being fat, do you?
Robin Edgar said…
Indeed I do not.

The "fun-poking" phrase that cannot be written here during Lent was inspired by, and references, the movie title 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding'. I apply it quite indiscriminately when I want to emphasize that some Unitarian Universalist *thing* is big. The phrase is applied to things rather than to persons of inherent worth and dignity regardless of whether or not they are fat or thin or somewhere in between. In fact, somewhat ironically, I have refrained from applying that phrase to UU weddings in order to avoid offending innocent persons of inherent worth and dignity getting married in UU churches. Presumably you are concerned about my use of that phrase in relation to that "less than svelte" (to say nothing of "less than polite") Unitarian Universalist minsiter known as Rev. Dr. Victoria Weinstein aka Peacebang. Please be assured that any personal insults and-or other forms of verbal abuse that I may mete out to Peacebang is a response to her own deeply insulting, and even slanderous and libelous, verbally abusive attacks on me and other persons of inherent worth and dignity which she has yet to acknowledge and apologize for, and has little or nothing to do with the fact that she is obese.

In fact, in Peacebang's case, that "less than polite" phrase indirectly alludes to the obscenity of her quite literally big and fat "sodomy fantasy" which quite Sadistically imagined "South Dakota state senator Bill Napoli anally impaled on the Statue of Liberty's torch." So it has rather more to do with Peacebang's obscenity than her obescity. . .